Kick me while I'm down, why don't you?

We went to the camp open house today. I have lost most of my enthusiasm for this camp. The woman in charge asked everyone what session they were coming to, so she could customize things she was talking about (although there were only 5 families there the whole time we were there so it wasn't hard to customize). I said Girls Weekend Out. She manages to tell us how it is her least favorite weekend (well, no big surprise there a lot of the moms are pretty obnoxious, but she could sound more encouraging) and how we'll be spending the weekend going into town shopping and getting our nails done because "that's the only thing I can get you moms to do."

Excuse me? Now I knew there was a field trip to town scheduled. There's a big touristy town about 20 minutes away with galleries and ice cream places and antique shops. I am assuming it is a Saturday afternoon trip to the town. That's fine, a lot of camps do field trips. We'd rather stay at camp and do camp things but we thought we'd give it a try.

But to tell me that the only thing I'm willing to do is shop and get my nails done? I hate shopping in those tourist traps of towns. They are too crowded. They are too expensive. I can't stand the yuppie scum that goes there, pushing their gigantic baby strollers through the tiny stores, or stopping on the sidewalks to smoke. I've never in my life had my nails done professionally, I'm sure as hell not starting when I'm going to camp.

She said we moms wouldn't canoe. You can't get me out of a canoe until my arms fall off my shoulders. She said we wouldn't do archery. Hello, give me the bow and arrow and I'll do my best to shoot you with it (although I'll miss you by a mile, I love to try, I'm just no good). She said we wouldn't do the rappelling wall. I've never tried it before, but if there's ever a time to try something scary it is when you are with Girl Scouts.

I think we signed up for the wrong session. Sad thing is, it was the only multi-night choice for moms and daughters.

So who are these moms who like to go to camp so they can browse antique shops and get their nails done? And why on earth are they going to Girl Scout camp in the first place? We've met a few each session we go to. But I always assumed they don't go back after one miserable trip. There are always plenty of moms alongside me dragging our canoes through the mud, hiking through the mud, singing at the campfire, swimming and stomping through the creek having a grand time. We have seen several of the same moms and daughters session after session. Where are the going this summer and is it too late for us to sign up?

Violet hates being dragged through art galleries and antique shops and kitschy stores. (Don't other 9 to 12 year old girls? What do they do while their moms shop and get their nails done, other than vow never to bring their moms to camp ever again?) So when we left the camp we went to the town to scout it out. We found a river we could walk along. We can visit a couple of historic sites. And the one that I think has gotten Violet's vote: we found the public library.

So while I'm stressed and a bit down anyway, add to it tonight that now I'm going off to Girl Scout camp, just to go hang out at the library. Because apparently I'm a freak who actually likes to camp and therefore signs up to camp. I'm supposed to like to shop and have my nails done. I don't fit in anywhere.

I hope the weekend is better than I think it will be. Maybe some of our other friends from past camps will be there and we can find something better to do than get our freaking nails done. Good God what is wrong with people. I'll check out the library's website. Maybe there will be some sort of program we can sign up for there. I guess sitting in the air conditioned library, in comfy chairs, reading books all afternoon won't be all bad. Probably better than listening to moms whine about getting mud on their shoes, if these women who go to this camp really are that bad.

Stay tuned, I'll post in June about when Freakmom and Freakkid go to camp and actually expect to camp there.