Thank you!

Thank you all for your kind words on the passing of my aunt. I really appreciate it! You all mean so much to me. (((hugs)))

We haven't heard if there will be a memorial service or not. My oldest cousin lives in China and has not yet been able to travel back home. I expect they won't decide anything until he gets here. If they do have something they may decide to keep it just the three children and their families.

Mr. I. doesn't understand any of this or why they may not have a service at all. And especially why, if they do have one, my mom doesn't plan to go. She says we out of town family would just be a burden on them. And I know she has sworn off ever returning to her home town. She has a lot of demons there. She was very close to her sister, and despite their issues over the years, they had a better relationship than my mom did with any of the rest of her family.

On Sunday we went to my parent's house, we had it planned for nearly a week, the timing was just good. Mr. I. and I went to see Star Trek while Violet hung out there and took my mom's mind off things. When we got back my mom had decided to dedicate part of her garden to her sister and plant flowers in it every year. My dad will make a nice wooden sign for her. We all went out and planted some Sweet William seeds (William just happens to be the name of my aunt's youngest grandson). In my mom's mind, that was the memorial service. Mr. I. can't get it through his thick skull that for her, that was the closure she needs. He keeps insisting she must go for a real funeral (which there won't likely be).

If it seems like this blog post is going in circles it is because I've been going in circles. Trying to explain this to him. He just won't get it. And frankly, it is starting to bug me that he won't accept that not everyone has the same outlook, ideals, and ways of doing things that he does. At this point I'm hoping we aren't contacted about a memorial in time to get there. I wouldn't mind going. But I don't want to referee my mom and my husband. (My dad won't take a strong side. He'll offer to go and drive mom there but he won't say if he wants to or thinks she should.)

Personally, it seems wrong to drop everything and go to a memorial service now. Why couldn't we have gotten our butts down there last summer when we could have spent time with her? That's when it would have made a bigger difference. If my cousin calls with the information in time for us to go, and indicates she'd like us to go, then I'll be packing my overnight bag and loading into the car. I'll just wait and see what happens in the next week.

And we all know how good I am at waiting and seeing! LOL